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June 2009

The Three C's of Web Design

Written on June 25, 2009 by Lipstick Nerd

Clean
If you were trying to sell your house, would you leave your stuff laying around everywhere when potential buyers come to look? If you were serious about selling, then probably not. You’d tidy the place up and make it smell lemon-y fresh.

The same goes for websites. If you’ve got a graphic here and a graphic there, that’s just peachy-keen, but if you’ve got them all over the place with no apparent cohesion whatsoever, it is going to turn them off. Way off. They’ll be Googling again in a matter of seconds. Please, don’t make them Google.

The key is to only use graphics when absolutely necessary. For instance:

  • To make the site more visually appealing
  • To display a chart or graph of some kind
  • To give pictoral gratification with your text

You may have seen a site or two that had a few dozen graphics all over the place and thought it was nice. If so, I’m guessing you might be one of those people at Christmas time who covers every square inch of their house with Christmas lights, puts 10 of those mechanical reindeer in their yard, has five of the Frosty the Snowman blow-up lawn decorations, and presents a nativity scene that is bigger than their own house.

I’m not saying that’s a bad thing. It’s just a matter of preference and you happen to be in the minority.

Clear

When I say “clear,” I mean it in two ways.

First, the content must be clear and easy to read. Using dark text over a dark background (or light on light) is as annoying as it is senseless.

Also, make the text large enough for normal people to decipher. The only way visitors would be able to read 6pt text is if they put their face an inch away from the computer screen and squint. Don’t make people squint. They hate squinting. Not only does it strain the eyes, but it also creates premature wrinkles could lower their self-esteem. Make people squint, and they will end up having very low self-confidence and will resent you for it.

When adding images to the site, make sure they are of decent enough quality so that they don’t think the picture of your dog is a picture of a family of rats. Photos with lots of different colors should be in jpeg format and set at least at medium quality (5 to 7).

Second, the purpose of your site must be clear. If you are trying to sell cake, yet you’ve got flowers, fairies and butterflies all over the page without a cake in sight, people will arrive at your site and think there has been a mistake. They wanted a cake store, but apparently they ended up on the Enchanted Forest Website. Make sure the design reflects the purpose of the website.

Also, don’t forget to leave your poetic genius out of your written content. Forget the similes, metaphors, and symbolism. Just get right to the point. No sugar-coating or beating around the bush. Just tell your visitors straight up what they will find on your web space.

Clever
Be creative, be original, and be interesting! If your site looks exactly like 1,000 other websites, visitors will be instantly bored. Keep their attention with an appealing color scheme and layout. Add some cool graphics (but remember, make them clear).

To come up with a neat design, open up Photoshop or some other image editing program. If you’re not savvy with those, do some drawing and coloring. Create a bunch of designs for your site and you’ll find out that you can bang out some great ideas. In my experience, I have always like the ninth and tenth designs better than the first, second or third. Eventually, you will come up with something you absolutely love and others will love too.

One more thing … Go easy on the Flash, people!
Even though it doesn’t start with a C, I think it is very important to mention.

Look, I know Flash animations are super cool. They attract the eye and grab your attention. It is great to use Flash, but in moderation.

Flash is like the Fats, Oils and Sweets category of the food pyramid. Everyone loves this category, but if you eat too much fats, oils and sweets, it slows your body down and ends up hurting it. Flash is no different, except it does not have any bodily repurcussions. If you overindulge on the Flash, it will end up slowing your website down and eventually make it useless. What use is there for a website if it takes so long to load and nobody wants to visit it?

So, now you are aware of the Three C’s plus the dangers of Flash. Now you can live a happy life!

Run little rabbit, run!



Filed under Website Basics

Let's Do the Time Warp

Written on June 19, 2009 by Code Monkey

As Johnstown quickly approaches the kick-off for this year's Thunder in the Valley motorcycle rally, there has been much buzz around our office over a band called "Giants of Science" - they'll be playing at the Richland Fire Hall from 9 to midnight on Saturday, June 27th.

Being wholly out of the local music loop for quite a few years, I ventured onto the web for more information. Upon locating the "Giants of Science" website, I remembered very clearly what attracted me to this career - a compulsive need to make the web a prettier place.

Any old school geeks out there will remember a little place called 'Geocities' - sort of the original free web server. Many, many of us created our first websites there. And for the few of us fortunate enough to still hold accounts, we are able to look back in horror at what was once considered top-of-the-line, cutting-edge development. But times have changed, technology has evolved and developers have honed their skills far beyond the standards of 1995. Yet some of these gems of days gone by remain, floating eternally through cyber-space - a reminder of just how far we've come.

That being said, in honor of the "Giants of Science" dedication to maintaining that retro-web vibe, I present to you a short list of some of the most outdated, obfuscated, ultra-retro websites I could find:



Filed under Website Basics

Top 10 Songs for Summer

Written on June 18, 2009 by Moosey

“Summer, summer, summertime… time to sit back and unwind.” A classic intro to such an amazing song. Before Will Smith became this multi-gazillionaire movie star, he was subtly dubbed the “Fresh Prince”. The “Prince” (no relation to Prince himself, the “artist formerly known as”, or that sign he finger painted) and his sidekick, Jazzy Jeff, put together the unofficial anthem for summer. Once the nice weather breaks, I immediately go to my iPod, put on the head phones and turn that baby to maximum volume (mine goes to 11).

This song made me think and I went digging through my vast, yet limited, music library to see what other songs were a perfect fit for this time of the year. As I was researching, I realized what effect music has on us in different ways (at least on me). It seems every year that a tune is released during the summer, and will be grossly overplayed. We’ll hear it again years later and we can’t help but be reminisce about those times “back in the day.” Some are literally about summer; others have that vibe that makes us want to drive down the highway, windows down and the speakers thumpin’.

What makes a great summer song? Some tracks remind us of that special someone, spark nostalgia, or embedded with a particular event. Whatever the reason, I would like to share my Top 10 Songs for the Summer:

10. Sublime – Doin’ Time
9. Van Halen - Dreams
8. Dr. Dre and 2pac – California Love
7. Stone Temple Pilots – Sex Type Thing
6. Aerosmith – Sweet Emotions
5. Alice Cooper – School’s Out/No More Mr. Nice Guy
4. Lil’ Rob – Summer Nights
3. Don Henley – Boys of Summer
2. Bryan Adams – Summer of ‘69
1. Will Smith - Summertime
Honorable Mentions: The Outfield – Your Love; Rolling Stones – Gimme Shelter; Tom Petty – American Girl; Bananarama – Cruel Summer; Smashing Pumpkins - 1979

Do you remember where you were when the Pittsburgh Penguins won the 2009 Stanley Cup finals? With the Steelers winning the Super Bowl, the Pens taking the Cup from Detroit, do you think if the Pirates had a .500 season, do you think Pittsburgh could be considered the city of champions for 2009?

Until next time, Hibbleton!

Filed under General

Ads that make me LOL for the wrong reasons

Written on June 15, 2009 by Lipstick Nerd

1. AXE Operation Dance Trap

This spot features a roomful of young whippersnappers dancing in a club. One guy in particular is dancing around with large, popcorn-sized pieces of what apparently is supposed to be dandruff on his head and shoulders.

Two ladies come up to him and pretend to start dancing with him. Suddenly, the girls throw Johnny Flakes to the floor, dump a bucket of water on his head, and wash his hair with Axe Anti-Dandruff shampoo forecfully against his will.

This is the part that makes me LOL. A girl walks up to the microphone on stage and announces: “Listen up everyone! 85% of girls agree that dandruff on a guy is a turn-off.”

Only 85%? LOL. Who are these remaining 15% who think dandruff is irresistible?

When filling out a questionnaire about whether or not dandruff was a turn-off, did they actually mark the check box that said: “No, I love dandruff” ?

You may have seen some Axe Hair Crisis Relief commercials between your regularly scheduled programs, and all in all I think they are decent ads. But this one in particular made me LOL for the wrong reasons.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p_4c9YDX4bM

2. Any Commercial Featuring Ozzy Osbourne

Why is it that lately everyone wants Ozzy Osbourne as their spokesperson? Correct me if I am wrong, but he is quite infamous for his heavy, uh… “rock star” lifestyle and his lack of motor skills as a result of it. What made these marketing execs decide this was a good idea? I would’ve liked to be at their meetings.

   Tom: OK guys, we are in desperate need of a spokesperson for our popular computer game, World of Warcraft.

   Hank: Yes. We need someone who captures the very essence of this game. Someone dangerous. Someone epic. Someone… dark.

   Tom: Not only that, but we need to choose someone appropriate for our target audience. We don’t want teenagers to be influenced by someone with a long history of alcohol, drug and animal abuse.

   Greg: You’re right. But who, Tom? Who?

   Hank: I got it. Ozzy Osbourne.

   Tom: Brilliant! Hank, you are going places, my friend. You have a future in this company, that’s for certain.

   Hank: He’s the Prince of Darkness, you know. Plus, he curses a lot and it’s funny to hear all the beep sounds.

   Tom: Haha! You’re right! That is funny!

   Hank: We should have him yell “Sharon” at the end of the commercial, too. That’s always hilarious.

   Greg: Wait… Ozzy Osbourne? That doesn’t seem right.

   Tom: Quiet, Greg. You’re a burden to this team.

   Greg: No, really. Ozzy Osbourne? That guy from Black Sabbath? You can barely understand him when he talks. How would he be a good spokesperson for World of Warcraft? Or anything, for that matter?

   Hank: What‘s a Black Sabbath?

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure Ozzy has straightened up since his glory days. After all, he raised three children and helps take care of like 600 pets. And by “help” I mean forget their names and yell indecipherably at them. But the point is, the fact that people use Ozzy Osborne’s image to represent their products makes me LOL for the wrong reasons.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8OgYWLSrmlI

3. Denny’s “Nannerpuss”

Actually, this one is supposed to be funny but doesn’t make me laugh. Why? Because I don’t see what’s so wrong with the Nannerpuss. You’ve got a stack of pancakes with a banana on top. So what? Pancakes are delicious, and bananas are good for you. They contain generous amounts of potassium.

Not only are bananas good for you, but the Nannerpuss banana (or as I like to call him, Professor Nanner) has a little handlebar mustache, making the meal all the more classy. What’s wrong with adding a little class to your breakfast?

If you ask me, I’d take Nannerpuss over steak and eggs any day.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kK6F7t-x6E



Filed under General

Today is Tuesday

Written on June 9, 2009 by Moosey

It's noon, and I'm sitting at my desk overly stuffed from my super-sized breakfast. Here's a tip: do not eat pancakes before work. I believe they have the same chemical as turkey, only more powerful. Can you OD on pancakes? I wouldn't want to find out. Watch Jim Gaffigan's "Beyond the Pale" stand-up, he goes on a nice rant about pancakes.

I thought that since this will be my first ever blog, I'm going to ease into with a few little rants and tidbits of information that I thought are interesting:

I think central PA is a wonderful place to live. Seriously. My only ache is the extreme weather we receive. December 26th, 2008, it was like almost 80 degrees. Are you serious? But at the same time I was happy for it because that was the day I was moving back to the area from Pittsburgh. And then in April we get subfreezing temps. Our meteorologists do the best they can, but start packing for every weather possibility.

I miss playing summer baseball. I had a good glove, wasn't that great at the plate, but a pretty good bunter. I was picked for an all-star team one year, and hit third in line-up, which was weird because I normally set up shop in the bottom third of the order. Anyways, the reasoning behind me hitting in the heart of the lineup was of the possibility of the first two batters reaching base, I would bunt them over. I didn't understand it. Normally the best hitter bats third and has the chance to drive in more runs. We were giving up an out. Needless to say we didn't make it too far in the tourney. I can't be blamed: no one got on base for me to advance.

I will end this with what I am most excited about for this summer: (drum roll) Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen. I was never into Transformers as a child, it was Ninja Turtles or nothing. Upon seeing the first one, I realized I missed out on something great. Apparently the sequel is going to be bigger, badder, and darker.

I don't understand why action/comic book movies don't go for more of a darker tone. If the movie is beefed up with storylines, character development/relationships, you won't need to overload the movie with special effects or slapstick humor (see The Dark Knight). I understand they want to appeal to all audiences and the child demographic is a cash cow. But there is something to say about movies like this that head down a darker path. I am not a movie critic, or did not go to school for anything like this. These movies based on comics originally had a darker, real world tone to them. There is the source material and where the movie should be derived from.

Game 6 tonight of the Stanley Cup Finals - GO PENS!!!

Filed under General